Yesterday after our morning sensual practices, I thought to myself, “That was fun, like really fun. Especially fun”. I was thinking about everything that made it fun, the factors that went into our sensual time being fun, looking at it in sort of an academic way. Not detached….more like a researcher.
There were some random factors, like, we had just been in a class all weekend with our spiritual community and it had been really wonderful and opening. And maybe the sensual time was just randomly fun that day. And, I had gotten great sleep the night before, etc, etc.
Then I realized, OMG
There are 3 main factors I have found that affect the amount of sensual energy in our bodies at any given time:
a. Yearly – meaning the seasons. Have you ever noticed that there are certain times of the year where we tend to be more turned on, and other times where we tend to be less turned on? Think Spring – it warms up, people start wearing less clothing and going outside more, there is a lightness in the air, new life, the phrase Spring Fever came from somewhere right? That is the time of year where turn on and sensual energy are the highest. Contrast that with Winter…it is (generally) cold, we wear more clothing, it gets dark early, we hunker down and stay home more, sensual energy is at an all-time low. Sensual energy is at its highest in the Spring, drops down in the Summer, rises in the Fall, and goes down to the lowest point in the Winter.
b. Monthly- meaning a woman’s monthly cycle. Sensual energy is at its highest at ovulation, then drops down, then rises right before menstruation (PMS anyone? PMS is the “diagnosis” for simply having lots of sensual energy running through your body! When it is not recognized/enjoyed as such, it can feel like agitation or moodiness, an uncomfortable energy build up in the abdomen, etc), then drops to the lowest point after menstruation. This is cycle is less pronounced in women who have gone through menopause.
c. Daily- simply means that a woman’s sensual energy is higher in the morning vs the evening generally.
a. Certain situations will create more sensual energy in a woman’s body than others. Imagine being in a beautiful social environment in nature with others turned on women and great men, with amazing music and a great vibe VS sitting in line for 2 hours at the DMV. The first situation will promote feeling one’s body and feeling sensual, the other will not. This information is good because it means you can have some deliberate control over how turned on you are. Literally putting yourself in situations that will turn you on, increase your body sensation and pleasure will have you be more turned on!
a. Because of our brain structure as female humans, we have the ability to WILL ourselves to feel more in our bodies, just because we want to, of our own volition. Meaning, even if it is the dead of winter, and you are sitting in the DMV, you COULD deliberately feel your body, focus on your genital area, think sexy thoughts and actually turn yourself on!
One note regarding gender identification. The majority of my research has been with women that identify as heterosexual or bisexual. I am learning about the experiences of people that identify otherwise, so feel free to share your experiences with me so I can learn the nuances of how this goes for as many people as possible. Thank you.
So how does this all relate to the sensual experience Erwan and I had the other morning? Well, one thing I noticed was – all three categories were turned up on high! It is the peak of fall – a high point in the heat cycle, I was ovulating and it was morning time. It was a relaxed atmosphere with sexy music with my husband and I deliberately chose to feel my body and enjoy myself. So OF COURSE, it was really fun!
What I love about this research is that it shows that ALL of us can be deliberate about how much pleasure we feel, how turned we are and how much fun we can have. It creates a “sky is the limit” experience for pleasure.